Don’t be afraid to start over. It’s a chance to build something better this time. Fell of the wagon and now back on the gain train!

Don’t be afraid to start over. It’s a chance to build something better this time. Fell of the wagon and now back on the gain train!
This is for anyone who has seriously worked towards gaining it and for some reason got distracted / went off the track down the line and had to start all over again or is thinking of doing so.The RiseI found r/gainit and started my first proper bulk in May 2014 – as a scrawny 5’7 and 120 lbs guy suffering from extreme social anxiety & depression and went all the way up to 153 lbs by February 2015 and I felt like I my social anxiety / depression almost went away.This whole period was amazing – I was looking the best I looked in several years – my body and face looked so much fuller and had a healthy glow, I proudly outgrew several pairs of clothes – I still remember being shocked one day when I couldn’t fit in a pair of jeans that used to be too big for me an year ago.I also went from having severe social anxiety to almost over confident / pompous (in a good way) with barely any depression days if at all.The FallMy fall from grace started sometime around May 2015. I had bulked too fast, too much for too long and one of the biggest blunders I made was that I had no idea how important protein intake was and I guesstimated the calories of lunch & dinner (home cooked Indian food) so I was probably going a lot more than TDEE+500 on certain days.I had also missed a lot of workouts due to stress / lack of time from a failed business venture I started around this time so coupled with my poor protein intake my lifts just kind of stalled midway.The result was I was up to 26% bodyfat and went from skinny -> somewhat fit -> skinnyfat.I wasn’t still completely off the track at this point – I posted my issues here and on r/fitness and figured out my mistakes, and I knew I had to go on a cut and I committed to a cut for the next few months. I was eating a deficit all this while and my lifts sucked even more in the gym, and I still kept missing a lot of workouts along the way but I did come down to 13 – 14% bodyfat in the end.Around March 2016 I was almost back to square one weighing 120 lb again and I was ready for a proper bulk this time without my past mistakes.I made sure I met my daily protein goals in addition to the calorie goal, and to not gain anything more than 0.5 lbs per week as I knew it’d be mostly fat unlike the last time.Barely two or three weeks into this bulk I started having non-stop diarhea and other GI problems. At first I thought its just normal as my body is getting adjusted to a bulk again – but it went on and on and after going to a doctor weekly for almost 2 months I finally got diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome type D which has no cure other than taking a tablet called Immodium to stop the diarrhea temporarily with the side effect of being kind of constipated and a little drowsy.My doctor asked me to stick to a minimal diet for the next few months for numerous tests so I had to say bye-bye to my bulk and I also totally quit working out soon after.My depression crept up back again big time – to put it mildly IBS, especially IBS type D sucks big time. Imagine having diarrhea all the damn time every few hours and your other option is to take a tablet which will constipate you for the next 1 -2 days. My social anxiety also came back big time not long after I totally stopped working out.Anyway fast forward to around a week ago this month, I decided enough is enough and to quit all the bullshit and get back on the gains train once again.IBS or no IBS I don’t give a damn, I’ll take Immodium tablets all day everyday if I have to I don’t care. At least the diarhea is taken care of.I’m back to a proper bulk diet which I originally planned to do in March this year but couldn’t because of the fucking IBS hitting me out of nowhere and that as a person with no GI issues in his life before that.I’m hitting my calorie goals, hitting my protein goals, getting the right amount of fiber, water, not missing any workouts and won’t miss any unless I’m injured or dead.Even though it sucks to have IBS-D I just don’t care about it anymore because I can’t do anything about it other than take Immodium.So I’m only going to care about things that I CAN do something about and that is getting back on the gains train and going back to my confident and healthy self and achieving my fitness goals and turning my dream body into reality over the next few years.I’m starting over but I’m not sad about it – it really is a chance to build something better this time. :)TL;DR: Went on a bulk first time, then had to cut for a bit as I bulked too much / with inadequate protein the first time, after my cut I go on a improved and proper bulk second time but 2 weeks into this bulk I get diagnosed with motherfucking IBS-D. Several months of missed workouts and barely eating anything as a result, led to my depression and social anxiety coming back this time and looking like a unhealthy stick again. Had enough of this bullshit and I’m back on the gains train again and starting over with the mindset that I won’t stop now unless I get injured or die. IBS can go fuck itself!Recommended viewing: Eminem – Not Afraid (You will love the lyrics)
Hum Tv Dramas Lyrics 2015
Submitted by syedsameer

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s